Sexual Rights and Information Activism - What Does this Entail?
Apparently there is some confusion about why I do what I do and what it means. I get questions like the following, for example:
- Why do you need an activist approach to share information about sex?
- Why are Sexual Rights unclear?
- How do feminist issues tie into your work and why don't you just call yourself a feminist?
I'll get to answering these in a moment, but let me first define sexual rights and information for you. Sexual Rights involves any right that is related to human sexuality and sexual issues. This means that the term encompasses everything from an individual's right to say 'no' to sexual intercourse to if a homosexual partner of someone has as much of a right to be insured through them as a heterosexual partner. I haven't ventured very much into the latter territory on sextech for various reasons, but it is certainly the case that those topics will get discussed here because as much as people don't like to think it should all tie together, it really does.
People base much of their lives on their sexuality. They do so even to the point that who they choose as a mate is what they may base their own happiness on. This isn't something they can control, necessarily, but it is often the case that they don't even think about it. The human condition is so rooted in this behavior that we see it everywhere. Romances of some form or another exist in the great majority of books, movies and media; we get involved with the romances of others and try to affect them; we fantasize about having romantic liaisons with people we know and even people we don't know and we often build our lives accordingly.Of course, there are degrees of relevance to issues presented here. Sexual rights does seem to be more directly related to when it is ok to say 'no' than it is related to the aforementioned insurance issue. This doesn't make the issue unimportant, though. A good comparison to this may be that property rights ties more in to if you should have the right not to have your house robbed than it does to how much the government should be able to tax you. While the latter is related to property rights and is discussed as a property rights issue, it is not as directly related as stealing.
That being said, we will still venture out into various issues like homosexual and even reproductive rights but have just not done so yet.
Sexual Information Activism is the main goal of this site. Sexual Rights is here because the two go hand in hand, but the main point is still to get sexual information out to people. So why do we need an activist approach to this? Because people like talking about sex, but they don't like talking about sex. That is to say, people like talking about sex as long as there is a clear sexual benefit right in that moment. They like talking about sex as long as it provides masturbation fodder or a way to work sex into their next date. The moment the discussion gets serious, though; the moment the discussion is no longer about their gratification, the interest tends to fade away. If we're discussing how hot a certain person is or how we like to get just the right angle in 69 then most people will stay right on track, but the moment that it becomes a matter of being able to identify where said sexy person's labia is or if she should be able to say 'no' to intercourse once it has already begun, eyes begin to glaze over or the direction of the conversation may get lost. These things become less important to the individual.
Another problem is that people like to pretend that they don't want to talk about sex or that they shouldn't. For some reason our most basic instincts are considered so distasteful that there are masses of people out there who are not comfortable enough with it to stop for a moment and tell inquiring minds that want to know what, precisely, a BJ is and how to do one. Fortunately there is some movement toward educating people so in inquiry about how to perform one entered into a search engine is certainly going to generate lots of results ... many of which will have different opinions on the matter. (Yes, even something so basic as how to give a BJ can be the topic of debate, go figure.). The drive to demonize human sexuality seems to be rooted in the idea that sex is only about reproduction. This is, of course, a silly idea. If sex was only about reproduction, we would only have sex when we were reproducing! Because of this flaw in thinking, though, people don't openly share sexual information as they need to and they will even discourage others from doing so as well. this is why it is a matter of activism and not just education.
So, why are sexual rights unclear? Because, much like many issues, there are hazy areas. It is an unfortunate reality of ours that instead of the following being true:
NO = no = No = nO
This is more true:
No = - (no) * |yes| ^ c
(where c = contractual agreements and other conditions)
Basically, saying something does not always mean what it is that we said. This problem includes the word 'no.' This does not mean that one should assume something else is meant whenever someone says the word, 'no,' it just means that there are some occasions (when other agreements have been made) where the word 'no' can be disregarded. For example, one very controversial sexual practice is consent play. This is where people violate someone's stated sexual boundaries, but (if they are playing by some ethical rules) it is with the permission of the other party. These people may create a contract before they start and establish a safe word so that the submissive in the situation can have some control, but the goal is for the submissive to give up control. Confusing? Good. I hope it motivates you to come and read again when I describe this particular topic more in depth. This same problem can extend to other aspects of sexual rights.
Another problem is in defining rights. In reality, humans have created the concept of rights and this makes it pretty unclear in how the concept applies to various things. For example, not many people can come up with a clear and rational reason for why we have the right to privacy. It isn't that the right shouldn't exist, it is that the matter is more complicated than we like to admit because of how the concept was created. Sexual rights is not exempt from this problem. Many people have tried to compose their own declarations regarding what innate sexual rights we all should have. The problem is, most of these declarations become exclusive. Some are hetero-centric, some stick only to mainstream sexual practices and exclude BDSM and other alternative play and some try to ignore ethics in favor of play that could lead to unwanted harm. It is difficult to determine where to draw a line in regards to sexual rights and some people draw their lines in places where it is harmful to others.
So ... now we're back to that dirty little F word that was mentioned last week. No, not the four letter one. (Yes, I had to make the obvious 'f word' joke that has been made a million times everywhere on the internet where the word 'feminism' seems to appear). Firstly, I don't call myself a 'feminist' because there are better words to describe what I am. Even then, feminism, or at least, issues that many feminists point out, are an important element of sexual rights and information. This doesn't mean that feminists are right on everything or that the people they work against are wrong - it means that there are some things that they mention that deserve some form of attention. For example, the issue of if porn is bad for women is an important issue, even though many feminists are wrong when they claim that porn itself causes violence against women. Other issues that feminists deal with are important here as well even if their only tie in to this is because of some silly sexual bias that people have. For example, Gay Marriage is important to sexual rights and information activism because it is an argument in which one side's stance is rooted in a bias against an individual's sexual trait. Those sexual traits themselves can be discussed here, of course, without bringing up the issue, but since people think the way they do about the issue (as in, people tend to be unable to take in one set of information without considering all aspects of that thing that they feel is important to them), then the issue itself can't be left out of the discussion. Needing to discuss these issues, though, does not make the person discussing them a feminist.
The work here on SexTech is focused primarily on getting information out to people that they can use and apply in their own lives. It does cover a broad range of topics and it may seem to one day cater to a different section of people than it does on another day (as in, not everyone who likes Clit & Circumstance will like Master Debatable and/or Sexy Vocabulary), but this is for the sake of better communication. The same basic messages can be sent through various means but will be received differently, depending on individual tastes.
Hopefully this post answers some of the questions that I have encountered lately. Please feel free to ask for clarification, if needed.
