All those big and little things that set us on fire, the beautiful chaos that is the contrast of feminine and masculine body, mind and soul.

Let me continue. It’s even worse when you compare us to your mother. Is she such a saint? It doesn’t usually come out in a nice tone of voice. And no matter how much we try to cook a nice meal for you, your comment about how much you miss your mother’s cuisine is so not necessary. If it was up to you, we would probably eat take out every day.

Even though you have a hard time admitting it, we do actually know a lot more about sex than you do. Some of us have practiced and experimented with our girlfriends and contrary to what most men believe, that doesn’t make us gay. We are just lucky to be able to experiment. You on the other hand have to stick with what and whom you want. If you so much as feel attractive to a man and want to kiss him, that will usually lead you into a homosexual relationship.

Why do you want to know how often we masturbate? It is none of your business. We do talk about sex openly but why is it necessary to end up having sex when we are cuddling? Is it so difficult to understand we sometimes just want a gentle touch and romantic poetry? And no, sex is not the answer to everything. Especially when we had a hard day at work and received bad news, like our mother being in a hospital or the cat getting run over.

Sometimes it just makes it harder to pass the day when we don’t have a good hair day. No, you guys never have that problem. Of course not. Most of you dress as if you only got out of bed dressed like that and expect us to find it attractive. That might be why some of you are still single.

On top of that you use unoriginal pick-up lines we have been hearing all our sexually active lives. Well don’t bother. Our get-to-know-you approach is far more interesting. We can sing with our eyes.

Can you explain why we are supposed to know where your socks are? They’re probably where you left them and usually not in the hamper but next to it.

And the video games; are you still fifteen? Grow up!

That makes us wonder, maybe we should be dating someone a bit older who would also know a waffle iron is not a present to give someone on a special occasion. That’s one of the reasons we hold minor grudges.

And there is one thing no woman on this planet could ever understand: what is with the comb-over? Why do you believe that will fool us into thinking you have hair. No comb-over, please!

Comments are closed.