Weird Sex News: Roadside Sex, NFL and... No Happiness?

Child’s Play

A Georgia woman has been arrested and charged on suspicion of sex with a minor after being caught by police on a roadside.

Jessica R. Long, 32, of Oconee County, was charged with criminal sexual conduct with a minor under 16 years of age — second degree, according to a warrant. She stands accused of engaging in two bouts of oral and penetrative sex in her own vehicle.

Note the linked headline’s use of the word ‘lucky’. The propagated myth is that males having underage sex with a female adult is ‘good’, ‘fun’ or – as the headline states – ‘lucky’. Sorry to be a downer but it bears repeating that such incidents can damage people for life and distort their perceptions of love, sex, romance and even basic human interaction. Think twice before committing words like ‘lucky’ to things like this.

Touchdown… There In The Prison Shower

Sometimes there’s nothing as satisfying as seeing somebody who thinks it’s ok to post revenge porn get their comeuppance. Would the fact that they are a high-profile perpetrator add a little sheen to proceedings? Well, jealousy is a pretty fucked up thing but let’s not be bashful here… it helps.

Jermaine Cunningham – currently a free agent after spending time with the New York Jets – faces trial on charges of invasion of privacy, unlawful weapons transport and possession of hollow point bullets. Quite the rap sheet. One can’t help but think that if our friend Jermaine had spent as much time training as being a law-breaking dick then he might not be a free agent right now.

According to Jermaine’s lawyer, Tony Fusco, his client “regrets a few things”. As good a start as any, right? Fusco goes on to say that his client only sent a few not-entirely-nude shots to a few friends. His trial arrives at a time when revenge porn is being clamped down across the US. Should he be found guilty, then let’s hope they throw the book at him… then take a picture of it.

(No) Sex = (No) Happiness… or something?

It’s a long-held belief that the more you get laid the wider your… smile will be (What? You’re the one with the dirty mind!). Well, it looks like that might actually turn out to be a load of horseshit after all after a group of Carnegie Mellon University researchers concluded that more pumping for joy won’t necessarily have you jumping for joy.

The study took the form of several surveys issued to heterosexual married couples between the ages of 35-65. The surveys asked plenty of questions about each participant’s life – including the sexy stuff obviously – and half of the couples were ordered to double the amount of sex they were having. The rest were told to carry on as normal.

Ultimately, you can probably guess how this all panned out. Sex is a great invention and we’d love to shake the hand of the person who thought it up, but being told to double the amount of sex you have for the sake of science is not exactly the most potent aphrodisiac in history. Sure as night follows day, the couples who were held at gunpoint and forced to fuck (well, not exactly) reported either no change or less satisfaction.

“Perhaps couples changed the story they told themselves about why they were having sex, from an activity voluntarily engaged in to one that was part of a research study,” George Loewenstein, the study’s lead investigator and the Herbert A. Simon University Professor of Economics and Psychology in the Dietrich College of Humanities and Social Sciences said.

Fellow researcher Tamar Krishnamurti believes that there is still something to be learnt from all of this; namely that “instead of focusing on increasing sexual frequency to the levels they experienced at the beginning of a relationship, couples may want to work on creating an environment that sparks their desire and makes the sex that they do have even more fun.”

That’s what we love about science. Trial and error and peer reviews forever!

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